Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Just Last Month

On a Wednesday evening, just about a month ago, I decided to spend some time outdoors. My mind didn't want to be at work that day. So I struggled all day, just to be present in mind and body. It was the week after my mom's memorial service. I gave myself a rest from indoors after dinner. This is a hummingbird on a stake that I bought the week prior. My mom loved birds.  I decided to buy it, especially since the display of them caught my eyes on a pass by them on way back up to register. So I stopped and chose this bird. My mom loved these colors as well.

Now I'm enjoying it in the planter of my wedding dress hydragenea. It moves a bit in the wind.

I watered my hydrageneas in the tub. It was cooling. Refreshing. Calming.

Out front, with sunlight through the trees. Watering the grass. Lilac bush.

My fragrant roses.  My mind whirling. I should have just stopped that from happening. There was a bit of relief. I did talk to my old Marine neighbor. Fabian. He's widowed. Lives up the street from us.  He was scuffling down to the mailbox, with his dog.  I walked him home and we talked. About my mom who died recently. About his wife that died a few years ago.  I interjected a bit about God and heaven. He said he heard it was a nice place to be. Then changed the subject. I've decided to pray for him. Daily.

I walked back home. I stopped by my across the street neighbor's house. I enjoy this flowering tree when it's blooming in the summer. So pretty!

Back inside the house...into the kitchen. Wash my hands. Oh, I did shut the water off out back, right? Yes.  Put away the chicken chili I'd made in the crock pot early today. Cannelli beans and chicken..Enough for another meal for lunch.

Brewing tea for now and caffeinated tea for tomorrow (iced for work).

Catching up in my gratitude journal. See how close I am to 1000? I'll share that episode soon!

Fast forward to Friday.....Phil and I'd gone to get my mom's ashes in the a.m. Sigh! One more hurdle over, done. Went to lunch before I drove him to work. (His car was already at work). Then I went to my dentist appt. This was the calm scene in the waiting room. I needed that. I almost called the appt off. But I did ok. I had a sweet dental hygienist. She listened with care....a definite plus to my visit.


My bag of goodies.  Happy teeth!  Well, most of them....have a few cavities that will be fixed next week. Sigh!

Decided to get some grocery shopping done. I'd not been in the mood lately. Made myself go. Here's a portion of what I bought that day. Got a good meat deal as well.  So glad to be home.

Me....my shadow....in this time of life. Shadow of grief isn't hovering over me as much as it was last month. But it comes and goes. Especially the evening I was reading through list of meds I get from mom's health care each month. This paper work I read was just prior to her death. I just started crying. At the dinner table. After dinner. Phil came in and gave me a hug and kiss. We talked a bit. Release. Memories will always be there!

Fast forward to the next Friday....eye dr appt. My goodie bag. My eyes were good and vision stayed the same. More contact lenses ordered.

Stopped at Costco to get a magazine. I needed one to read since I was going to Social Security office. I didn't know how long the wait was going to be. So I bought this magazine since the photography magazine I wanted wasn't there. Sigh. Oh well, who's gonna complain about this photo? Makes me wanna eat it all!  I grabbed lunch at Costco then off to office........short wait of 5 minutes! Questions answered.  I could never get anybody to talk on the phone....wait....wait...wait....wait.....wait.for.it....never came!  The man who was helping me commented the small amount of people in that day. Usually they serve 250 people a day. When I was done, there were 3 other people!  Score for them as well!    Then I went and visited with my daughter in love, Erin, and grandkids for an hour before I headed home. Since it was quiet, I did a couple things. Then lay in my recliner under a blanket and slept.  That's what the feeling of the afternoon was like. I was done with running around with "death" errands. I needed sleep. It felt good to relax then make dinner.  Still have a few things to do but most of the hurdles are gone. One tomorrow....rubbing of grave stone so engraver can match the type of print to old print done 28 years ago when my dad died.  But it will be a nice day out with Phil.*****Right now I'm off a couple days...vacation from work. Was supposed to be getting our roof done. But decided to wait til next year. Various reasons.   ****Coming Soon......a give away for my 5th blogaversary that happened July 8. But I had more pressing matters in life. So give away was never done til I realized I'd better get to it. Life has settled a bit now. Thankful for God's love and mercy and His presence in our days of grief. Thanks to my blogger friends that prayed and understand.  It's been a long road. But I'm stronger. Feeling happier. Sleeping better.....for the most part.    A couple weeks ago we had a thunderstorm that was close, which isn't usual here in the valley. Sounded like storms we had in New Mexico.  Thunder woke me up. One clap of thunder was so loud it hurt my ear. I finally got back to sleep.  Good rain though.     We had rainstorm last night which was nice. With a bit of lightning and thunder.  It's been very hot here, again, not usual for our part of Oregon. 96 degrees on Sunday and Monday and cloudy Tues...rain in a.m.  Rain about 9 p.m. We really needed it. Now there's lovely birds outside. Singing. On a summer's afternoon!   Enjoy your day! Hugs, my friends and thanks for stopping by and letting me share a portion of my life with you. 

1 comment:

aimee said...

Being out in God's creation can be quite healing. Glad you are feeling a bit better:)
Blessings,
Aimee